Therapy for Teenagers: What Teenagers and Their Parents Should Know

When a young person expresses their desire to enter therapy, or a parent begins to think about therapy for their teenager, it is usually because something significant has shifted. It could be mood, behaviour, educational performance or attendance, or relationships. Underlying all of these changes, is a feeling in the family that the usual responses have not been quite as helpful as hoped. Conversations might not land as well as either party intends and there may be a sense in the air that something isn't quite right. Perhaps the young person is carrying or experiencing something that they aren't quite able to communicate or navigate through as successfully as they might have hoped.

Experiences that teenagers often bring to therapy

•       anxiety, worry, or panic that is interfering with daily life, be that school, friendships, or sleep

•       low mood, withdrawal, or a loss of interest in things that previously mattered

•       difficulties with identity, self-worth, or a sense of not fitting in

•       navigating neurodivergence

•       disordered eating or substance use

•       the impact of significant life events: parental separation, bereavement, a change of school or home

•       self-critical thinking or, in some cases, self-harming behaviour

Does therapy for young people differ from adult therapy?

The fundamental aims are the same: to create a safe, trusted space in which the young person's experiences can be expressed and understood, so that something internal or external is able to shift for them. Understandably, building rapport can take a little longer, as the young person may need a little more time to settle into the process and to realise that they can trust the therapist.

Conversations between teenagers and their parents about therapy

As a young person you might be worried about how your parent will respond to you wanting to seek therapy. As a parent you might feel uncertain about how to broach the idea of talking to someone, with your teenager. Open, authentic communication and transparency tend to be the best ways to get the process started.

Adolescence is an intense time of identity formation. Understandably, young people tend to respond poorly to feeling that a decision has been made about them without their involvement. Therapy is a space that can belong to the young person; a place where they can say things they may not feel able to express elsewhere. It is also worth being honest with young people about confidentiality and its limitations.

What to look for in a therapist for a young person

Consistently, the most important factor when evaluating what makes therapy successful, is the quality of the relationship. For therapy to be successful, young people need to feel able to be open, honest, and fully themselves; only they can decide if real rapport with a therapist is present or not.

My advice is always to prioritise working with a therapist who has specific experience of working with adolescents. A therapist who is willing to be transparent about how they work and who can clearly communicate about risk and confidentiality. A therapist who will involve the young person in decisions about the process. It is helpful to have a clear plan in place for how to help parents feel involved 'enough', in what is happening, without jeopardising the safety of the therapy space for the young person.

If you are a young person or a parent of a teenager, and would like to learn more about the therapy process, you are welcome to be in touch.

Dr Erin Reid is a counselling psychologist offering online therapy to individuals, couples, adolescents, and families across the UK and internationally, and 'Walk and Talk' therapy in Northwest London green spaces. Visit drerinreid.com to find out more.